The False Self: Where did all this begin?

Because of man’s disobedience you and I not longer has fellowship with our Creator.  Adam and Eve’s rebellion the only accurate reflection of who you and I are is lost.  We are now alienated from the very source of self-knowledge that really matters.  We have surrendered to the whispers of condemnation and shame coming from the Devil himself.  It is in his vested interest to keep you from your destiny.  As long as you are wandering and uncertain you are no threat to him.  Our opinion of who we are is skewed by the negativity and lies of the enemy.  There is only one clarion voice that can clear up your confusion.  You have been invited into an intimate relationship with your creator.  You must return to the love and truth of that relationship to experience the journey of discovery with Him.  Until you do, you are held captive to the fear and uncertainty of life without Him. 

Your tendency to hide and create masks is a natural instinct.  It begins when we are infants.  Thomas Merton states, “to say I was born in sin is to say that I came into the world with a false self.  I was born with a mask.”  (Page 13) It is the essence of sin to reject God the creator and to rely on your own effort.  The great tragedy is that in doing so that you trade your authentic purpose and destiny that God intended for the small, limited, one dimensional life that Satan offers.  You surrender your potential based on your uniqueness and design for the mundane, illusionary lie that the enemy offers.  You abandon your role in the Kingdom of the Creator.  You abdicate the fulfillment and satisfaction of living into your design.  These vanish with this fateful choice. 

Again Thomas Merton clarifies this choice.  He states, “When we identify ourself as separate from God… the essence of the false self… we position ourselves ‘over against’ the created order.” (Page 14)  You choose to rebel against your very own unique design.  One strange thing that occurs in the process of creating a false self is that you are often blind to it.  (Page 14) You do not even know what you have lost. 

After the creation of a false persona it requires great energy to maintain it.  It is exhausting.  It becomes an all-consuming effort (Page 31).  It is only an elaborate facade to cover our emptiness.  It is no more real or authentic for all your effort.  Every sin you commit to prop up the illusion puts a greater distance between yourself and the amazing, unique true self that God designed your to be.

The process of creating a false self begins when you feel threatened or insecure about how you present yourself based on the perceived expectations of someone else.  In some cases these are from the past.  Those in authority over us can have an exaggerated impact.  For instance I carry certain expectations from my father that stay with me.  One of these was shined shoes.  He meticulously polished his shoes and you could see your reflection in them.  I still feel a tinge of guilt if I look down and see a pair of scuffed shoes. 

Becoming aware of this is the first step to allow you to begin to notice when you start the process.  

Do you ever feel the weariness of pretending?

Are you experiencing the love of an accepting heavenly father?

Are you snuggling with your creator?

Are you self aware and paying attention?

Merton quotes from New Seeds of Contemplation.